Changed in our estimate of his
availability as a husband for you." He rose; the situation was
becoming highly perilous. "I must speak to your mother and fly.
I'm late for an appointment now."
As he drove away ten minutes later he drew a long breath. "Gad!"
said he half aloud, "Rita'll never realize how close I was to
proposing to-day. She ALMOST had me.... Though why I should think
of it that way I don't know. It's damned low and indelicate of me.
She ought to be my wife. I love her as much as a man of experience
can love a woman in advance of trying her out thoroughly. If she
had money I'd not be hesitating, I'm afraid. Then, too, I don't
think the moral tone of that set she and I travel with is what it
ought to be. It's all very well for me, but--Well, a man ought to
be ready for almost anything that might happen if his wife went
with that crowd--or had gone with it before he married her. Not
that I suspect Margaret, though I must say--What a pup this sort
of life does make of a man in some ways! ...Yes, I almost leaped.
She'll never know how near I came to it.... Perhaps Josh's more
than half-right and I'm oversophisticated. My doubts and delays
may cost me a kind of happiness I'd rather have than anything on
earth--IF it really exists.
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