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Banfield, E. J. (Edmund James), 1852-1923

"Confessions of a Beachcomber"

He took an early opportunity to
cross-examine one from whom he thought he could obtain confidential
information. "What Gwen sister belonga Glad?" he asked. "Yes, Mickie"
"Same mother?" queried Mickie. "Yes, of course." Then came without
hesitation or reserve the dumbfounding question: "Same father?"
THE ONLY ROCK
Some may sneer when absolute originality is claimed for the following
little anecdote, for almost a facsimile of it happens to be among the
most time-honoured of jests. Rounding Clump Point in a light
centre-board cutter, the Boss, who was steering, asked Willie, whose
local knowledge was being relied on: "Any stone here, Willie?" "Yes,"
was the response, "one fella." The words were yet on the lips of the boy
when the centre-board jumped with a clang. "Why you no tell me before?"
angrily remonstrated the Boss. Willie--"No more. Only one fella. You
catch 'em!"
SAW THE JOKE
Our blacks saw "friends" on the mainland beach, and lit two signal
fires. Mickie said, "Me tell 'em that fella bring basket."
Cross-examined, he had to admit that the two fires merely signified a
general invitation to his mainland friends to come across.


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