These two strokes have killed him, I am sure; no other bandits
have caused his death. God! can I ever make amends for this
murder and this crime? No, indeed; sooner will the rivers and
the sea dry up. Alas! how much better I should feel, and how
much comfort I should take, if only once before he died I had
held him in my arms! What? Yes, certainly, quite unclad, in
order the better to enjoy him. If he is dead, I am very wicked
not to destroy myself. Why? Can it harm my lover for me to live
on after he is dead, if I take no pleasure in anything but in the
woe I bear for him? In giving myself up to grief after his
death, the very woes I court would be sweet to me, if he were
only still alive. It is wrong for a woman to wish to die rather
than to suffer for her lover's sake. It is certainly sweet for
me to mourn him long. I would rather be beaten alive than die
and be at rest."
(Vv. 4263-4414.) For two days the Queen thus mourned for him
without eating or drinking, until they thought she too would die.
There are plenty of people ready to carry bad news rather than
good. The news reaches Lancelot that his lady and sweetheart is
dead. You need have no doubt of the grief he felt; every one may
feel sure that he was afflicted and overcome with grief.
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