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?©tien, de Troyes, 12th cent.

"Four Arthurian Romances"

When those who ride with him see him fallen to
earth, they suppose him to be in a faint, for no one sees the
noose which he had attached about his neck. At once they caught
him in their arms and, on raising him, they found the noose which
he had put around his neck and with which he sought to kill
himself. They quickly cut the noose; but the noose had so hurt
his throat that for some time he could not speak; the veins of
his neck and throat are almost broken. Now he could not harm
himself, even had he wished to do so; however, he is grieved that
they have laid hands on him, and he almost burns up with rage,
for willingly would he have killed himself had no one chanced to
notice him. And now when he cannot harm himself, he cries: "Ah,
vile and shameless death! For God's sake, why hadst thou not the
power and might to kill me before my lady died? I suppose it was
because thou wouldst not deign to do what might be a kindly deed.
If thou didst spare me, it must be attributed to thy wickedness.
Ah, what kind of service and kindness is that! How well hast
thou employed them here! A curse upon him who thanks thee or
feels gratitude for such a service! I know not which is more my
enemy: life, which detains me, or death, which will not slay me.


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