[1] Not so of drinking. Only last week we saw, with our own eyes, a
pot of ale in a barber's shop; and very good ale it was, too,
for we tasted it.
_Geographical distribution of barbers._--Although the majority of
barbers live near the _pole_, they are pretty diffusely disseminated
over the entire face of the globe. The advance of civilization has,
however, much lessened their numbers; for we find, wherever valets are
kept, barbers are not; and as the magnet turns towards the north, they
are attracted to the east. In St. James's, the shaver's "occupation's
gone;" but throughout the whole of Wapping, the distance is very short
[Illustration: "FROM POLE TO POLE."]
* * * * *
A LECTURE ON MORALITY.--BY PUNCH.
Moral philosophers are the greatest fools in the world. I am a moral
philosopher; I am no fool though. Who contradicts me? If any, speak, and
come within reach of my cudgel. I am a moral philosopher of a new school.
The schoolmaster is abroad, and I am the schoolmaster; but if anybody says
that _I_ am abroad, I will knock him down. I am _at home_. And now, good
people, attend to me, and you will hear something worth learning.
The reason why I call all moral philosophers fools is, because they have
not gone properly to work.
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