" "Why didn't he take his coat off?" "I wanted him to, but he
stood around till the thing opened itself, trying to invent some way of
unfastening it. That's William's trouble. He will invent. A little while
ago he got up a cabinet bedstead that would shut and open without
handling. It went by clockwork. William got into it, and up it went.
Bless your heart, he staid in there from Saturday afternoon till Sunday
night, when it flew open and disclosed William with the plans and
specifications of a patent washbowl that would tip over just when it got
so full. The result was that I lost all my rings and breastpin down the
waste pipe. Then he got up a crutch for a man that could also be used as
an opera-glass. Whenever the man leaned on it up it went, and when he
put it to his eye to find William, it flew out into a crutch and almost
broke the top of his head off. Once he invented a rope ladder to be worn
as guard chain and lengthened out with a spring. He put it round his
neck, but the spring got loose and turned it into a ladder and almost
choked him to death. Then he invented a patent boot heel to crack nuts
with, but he mashed his thumb with it and gave it up.
Pages:
158
159
160
161
162
163
164
165
166
167
168
169
170
171
172
173
174
175
176
177
178
179
180
181
182