Vice at the east and west end of town, is different only in form; in
substance it comes to the same thing, and in quality is equal to a
grain.
Never leave a dispute to be settled by arbitration; if you are rich,
always appeal to law, especially if your opponent be poor. The lawyers
will manage for you long before the case gets up to the Lords, and
perhaps secure your rival _in banco regis_ for expenses. In an
arbitration, the case may be decided against you in a twinkling. It is a
capital thing that justice and a long purse are sworn brothers; besides,
moneyed men should have some advantage in society.
So little is the value of an oath understood by any but the Bull family,
that none but the postboys and the vulgar use oaths in foreign nations,
America excepted; but that country being a chip of the old block,
already rivals honest John; outdo him she must not.
Lard your butter, wet your tobacco, pipe-clay your flour, sand your
sugar, sloe-leaf your tea, coal-ash your pepper, deteriorate your drugs,
water your liquors, alloy your gold and silver, plunder your lodgers,
and, while none know it, who is the worse! Then to church, and thank God
you are not as other men.
Live and talk as if you were to live for ever. If you have accumulated
tens of thousands, try and make them hundreds of thousands.
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