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Petronius Arbiter, 20-66

"The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter"

You shall also, if you think fit, shape me some of these
beds we now sit on, and all the people making their court to me. On
my right hand place my Fortunata's statue, with a dove in one hand,
and leading a little dog in her girdle with the other: As also my
Cicero, and large wine vessels close cork'd that the wine don't run
out, and yet carve one of them as broken, and a boy weeping over it;
as also a sun-dial in the middle, that whoever comes to see
what's-a-clock, may read my name whether he will or no. And lastly,
have a special consideration whether you think this epitaph sufficient
enough:
'HERE RESTS CAIUS POMPEIUS TRIMALCHIO, PATRON OF THE LEARNED. A TROOP
OF HORSE WAS DECREED HIM, WITHOUT SUING FOR, AND MIGHT HAVE BEEN A
SENATOR WOULD HE HAVE ACCEPTED IT. A PIOUS MAN, HONEST, VALIANT, AND
TRUE TO HIS FRIEND. HE RAISED HIMSELF FROM LITTLE OR NOTHING, BUT
LEFT BEHIND HIM A PRODIGIOUS ESTATE, YET NEVER HEARD A PHILOSOPHER.
FAREWELL TO YOU ALSO.'"
This said, Trimalchio wept plentifully, Fortunata wept, Habinas wept,
and the whole family set up a cry as it had been his funeral; nay, I
also whin'd for company: when, quoth Trimalchio, "Since you know we
must die, why don't we live while we may? so let me live my self to
see you happy; as, if we plunge our selves in the bath we shall not
repent it: At my peril be it; I'll lead the way, for this room is
grown as hot as an oven.


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