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Petronius Arbiter, 20-66

"The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter"

A father takes no care of his
children, because the having of heirs is such a mark of infamy, that
he who is known in that circumstance, dares not appear at any publick
game or show, is deny'd all publick priviledges, and only herds among
those that all men piss upon. But single men, who have no tyes of
nature that oblige the disposal of their wealth, are caress'd by all,
and have the greatest honours confer'd on 'em; they are the only
valorous, the only brave; nay, and only innocent too. You're going to
a city," added he, "like a field in a plague-time, where you can
observe nothing but one man devouring another, as crows dead
carcasses."
The prudent Eumolpus, as a thing so surprizingly new, began to be
thoughtful, and confest that way to riches did not displease him. I
believ'd it the effect of a poetick gaiety, that had not left his
years. When, "I wish," continued he, "I cou'd maintain a greater
figure, as well in habit as attendants, 'twou'd give a better colour
to my pretences: By Hercules, I'd throw by the wallet, and soon
advance all our fortunes."
Promising therefore to supply his wants, "we have with us," said I,
"the sacred vest of Isis, and all the booty we made at Lycurgus's
village; and you have given me such hopes, Eumolpus," added I, "that
were the goddess her self in my power, I'd pawn her for money to carry
on the design."
Upon which, said Eumolpus, "why delay we the bringing of our hands in
use? and if you like the proposal let me be called your master.


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