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L'Estrange, Alfred Guy Kingan, 1832-1915

"History of English Humour, Vol. 2 (of 2)"


_Knife-grinder._ Story! God bless you! I have none to tell, Sir;
Only last night a-drinking at the 'Chequers,'
This poor old hat and breeches, as you see, were
Torn in a scuffle.
Constables came up for to take me into
Custody; they took me before the justice,
Justice Oldmixon put me in the parish-
Stocks for a vagrant.
I should be glad to drink your honour's health in
A pot of beer, if you will give me sixpence,
But for my part I never love to meddle
With politics, Sir.
_Friend of Humanity._ I give thee sixpence! I will see thee d----d first!
Wretch! whom no sense of wrong can rouse to vengeance!
Sordid! unfeeling! reprobate! degraded!
Spiritless outcast!
(_Kicks the knife-grinder, overturns his wheel, and exit in a transport
of Republican enthusiasm and universal philanthropy._)
This poem, written as a parody of "The Widow" of Southey, is said to
have annihilated English Sapphics. Various attempts were formerly made
to adapt classic metres to English; not only Gabriel Harvey but Sir
Philip Sydney tried to bring in hexameters. Beattie says the attempt was
ridiculous, but since Longfellow's "Evangeline" we look upon them with
more favour, though they are not popular. Dr. Watts wrote a Sapphic ode
on the "Last Judgment," which notwithstanding the solemnity of the
subject, almost provokes a smile.


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